Outta Dodge
Covid has been devastating for so many people, and we have been tremendously lucky. We’ve spent most of it holed up at our cabin in the mountains, with the main challenges being living with 1) an ex, and 2) an only child with ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) who needs schooling and attention while we try to do our Corporate Empire jobs remotely. This is actually the best-case scenario, especially for a divorced family, and I’m grateful.
BUT- even that is really, really hard. Every day is a battle. Our work has suffered. We have all lost our shit regularly. We almost gave away our child. I would often go lock myself in my ‘Car Bar’ outside with a glass of wine while I tried to calm down. We hired a parenting counselor. Absolutely no learning happened. We had a feeling school would not be back in person this next year. And the thought of another full school year of this was enough to make me ramp up my dose of anti-depressants.
D and I share 3 priorities in this situation: our sanity, A’s education, and our work. They were all breaking down. The only real way to solve for all of them was getting A in full-time school. But where is that possible?? I had a brainstorm. My parents live in Scotland, where cases are low. They were going back to school in person. We could work anywhere. People there can pronounce my name! Why not move to Edinburgh for a year? I didn’t think there was any way D would say yes, but he was desperate and game, so planning began. Get A into a private school. Talk to our bosses. Get visas. Rent out and pack up 3 houses. Find a place to live and a car. Figure out how to move cats abroad. Check, check, check… it’s been remarkably smooth despite a constantly growing to-do list and much stress. It’s taken a few months, but here we are, on the brink of starting a new chapter. We are doing this!
I’ll miss so much about my life here- my friends, my house, the mountains- but man, I don’t think our family would have made it through more virtual school. If we weren’t already divorced, we would be again! And the fireworks between us and A were pretty spectacular- I want us to have a long and happy parent-daughter relationship, not end up killing each other. We’re so lucky to have this option, so I’m grabbing it by the tail. We might still make each other crazy this year… but at least we’ll be doing it in Scotland?!
I love to write, but haven’t in ages. This new chapter seems like the perfect time to make myself ‘use my words’- even if no one ever reads them, it’ll bring me joy to put them to paper.
Our new flat (second floor)
